Staying in love with The Dress

It’s a long time between “yes” and “I Do”, and I’m not just talking about the seemingly never-ending stretch between popping the question and walking down the aisle. The time from when you find your perfect wedding dress to when you actually get to see it again can be months long – maybe even a year.

For me, there were a few that came close to being “the one”, including the near-miss at Kleinfeld Canada. Those dresses will always be like your first love – it’s gone, you’re not going back for it, but occasionally it’ll pop into your head for no good reason.

After consulting with one of my favourite brides-to-be, Laura, I’ve come up with 5 ways to stay in love with your dress until your wedding day. Read on & stay strong!

Stop Looking. Seriously. Stop.

Temptation is all around. Especially Pinterest, Instagram and wedding mags, which are like Temptation Island for brides. Do yourself a favour and put on your wedding dress blinders: if you don’t see them, they won’t wheedle their way into your mind and plant the seed of doubt. Scroll quickly and flip with abandon – especially if you see your ‘dream dress triggers’ (mine are lace & tulle). The same goes for photos of yourself in dresses that were not ultimately “the one”. If you can’t keep yourself from peeking at them, delete them. And…under no circumstances should you be trying on another dress. Save yourself the meltdown.

Amsale QuinnAmsale Quinn – the dress I was obsessed with, couldn’t find in Toronto and nearly replicated.

Reminisce

Remember: you said yes for a reason. Think back to the moment you said yes and the little things leading up to it. That moment when the dress caught your eye, how it felt when you were zipped up and finally looked in the mirror, how you couldn’t stop staring when they added the veil. It’s easy to get swept up in the romance of a new dress, but you chose this one because it made you feel like a bride.

Daydream

Even after choosing the dress, it still doesn’t always feel real. Since it’s not hanging in your closet, the dress itself can feel so far out of reach and almost like it’s not a part of your big day at all. It’s not like you can just run and try it on whenever you feel like it! When I’m daydreaming, I always give myself that little nudge to envision in the dress, whether I’m gliding down the aisle or hopping in the limo at the end of the night. I think about how the dress will look as Mike twirls me around the dance floor (OK, reality check: how it’ll look as I sway in his arms like an 8th grader slow dancing to NSYNC) for our first dance. As the only constant in the big day aside from Mike and me, the dress has become a huge part of envisioning the day.

Oscar De La Renta AveryThe Oscar De La Renta that wasn’t

Use it as Inspiration

Aside from your venue, your wedding dress is one of the first real design decisions you’ll make. Whether it’s simple, over-the-top, detailed or delicate, your dress should inspire and inform your decisions from here on out. I like to pull up photos during vendor meetings so they can see the dress and use it to inform our conversation. And yes, Mike is now very used to looking away. From flowers to bridesmaid dresses to invitations, your dress can be the grounding element in your entire wedding design. Bonus: it’s harder to have second thoughts when you’re so busy telling people why you love the dress so much.

Enlist Your Friends

When in doubt, get a little help from your friends. They can remind you why you chose the dress and why it’s the perfect one. One of the things I always remember distinctly is Josh, one of my coworkers from both my past and current workplace, saying “This dress is you. The other one didn’t come close. It wasn’t enough.” after seeing both the dress I chose and the near-miss Oscar. My girlfriends who have been with me through the entire process are quick to vouch for my choice and my mom always reminds me how comfortable I am with Sarah and her team.

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How did you know your dress was the one? How did you keep from cheating on your dress or having second thoughts?

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  • amesguerra

    I just bought my dress this Sunday! It’s everything I want and everything I didn’t know I wanted! It only took me two dress shopping trips to find it. You’re totally right though about staying in love! Even as I went home that night, I thought “but it isn’t white!”. All the dresses on instagram are white, all the dresses I’ve been watching my friends and family get married in are white. But I look at my pictures and it reassures me that I made the best choice for me.

  • amesguerra I had the same thoughts when I was looking at photos of my dress. It will ultimately be a ‘candlelight white’ – a warmer off-white that looks better with my skin – but I tried it on in a ‘mocha’. I freaked out for awhile that I would only love it in mocha and hate it in the off-white, but I’m now at peace with it. You loved it for a reason! I hope this means your dress is blush – I would have looooooved a blush dress but will be doing it for my shower instead!

  • amesguerra

    stephaniefusco My dress is champagne with an ivory overlay, I love it because it’s so romantic! Blush is a lovely colour for a wedding dress too!