As much as those around you attempt to feign interest in your table linen choices, latest bridal party drama or the thousandth dress you’ve tried on, I’m pretty sure they’re not really all that interested. There’s only so much information you can consume about a wedding that isn’t yours. That is, of course, unless you’re a bride-to-be yourself.
Right after Mike popped the question, I shared a list of the 5 people you meet when you get engaged. What I didn’t realize when I wrote that post was that I was missing a seriously important category: the bride tribe.
Your bride tribe is the group of ladies in your life who are getting married in the year or so around the time of your date. It can include your best girlfriends, acquaintances from high school or university or even girls you’ve never met in real life. All that matters is that the tribe is living & breathing your reality every day too. They understand the strange mix of fears, tears, excitement, anticipation and mundanity of it all in a way no one else really can.
My own personal bride tribe has been a lifesaver. This motley crew of ladies has been assembled slowly but surely – some from before the engagement, back when we were in the same boat of knowing it was coming but not being entirely sure when; some more recently as my mid-twenties circle moves into wedding & babies land. They’re the girls I reach out to when I need vendor recommendations, when I want to bounce ideas around, when I want to gripe about my fiance in that frustrated-about-the-wedding-but-still-madly-in-love way. In the past few months, I’ve given honest opinions about their wedding dresses (and shared pics of mine!), been privy to more than a few meltdowns and planned to band together against shared vendors.
Meet My Bride Tribe
Brigid is also getting married in 2015 but her wedding will be entirely different from mine – something that makes our wedding-related convos even more fun. You might remember that we went to The Wedding Co. Show together back in the winter and had the best time ever. Next on our bride tribe to-do list: finding homegirl a dress!
Sara is a lovely lady I went to camp with as a child and have recently reconnected with thanks to my blog. Not only is she getting married just a few months before me – we’ve also booked the same venue! Our check-ins always leave me feeling so great about the wedding process and I love that we’re able to share details about our venue as well!
Alma, an acquaintance from university, just got married this past weekend and has been an amazing sounding board for just about everything under the sun, from vendors to family matters and beyond.
Dianna, my friend since forever, neighbour and hair whisperer (visit her at Brixton Parlour) is getting married in the fall and is always just a text away for a vendor recommendation or gut-check. I was so excited when she got engaged shortly after we did – the process is so much better with friends!
Also on the list? My amazing cousins and my friend Laura! Although their weddings have passed, they’ve been so helpful when it comes to vendors, picking my battles and generally just getting excited about the big day. They’ve seen it all, done it all and felt it all – nothing shocks them and they’re just about the best people to talk me off of any ledge I may be teetering on.
Yes – you’ll always have your girlfriends, your bridesmaids and your family. But don’t underestimate the value of giving them a bit of a break from the wedding babble and leaning on your bride-to-be friends instead. You might just find yourself with your very own bride tribe.